I am alive
Until I no longer had time for it, I hadn't realized how much fun I really had with fandom things. I really miss it and I hope that I won't have to set it aside for ever.
I saw my psychiatrist today for a checkup and I told him that I thought law school was a cult. My doctor laughed and said, "I completely agree. I know what you mean because I was in a cult too, it's called med school."
As a law student you spend your time surrounded by a very selective representation of the population, hearing nothing but legal ideas all day long, with no time in your life for ANYTHING but law school (no TV, no real time for cooking, hardly any time for exercise) and all you do is read read read and sleep. I hardly had time to clean or buy groceries and I was at school every. single. day. of the semester. Even Saturday and Sunday. I'd usually stay until dinner time because by then my guide dog was sick of school anyway and then I'd go home, shower/eat something, and work on school stuff until I went to sleep.
It was actually kind of weird when I came home and didn't have school work to do. I was like "what do I do with my time???"
What I have done: read a book just for fun, gone to the gym and spent as much time working out as I wanted, gone Christmas shopping for my family, had actual home cooked meals with my parents, watched the news and discussed what's going on in the world with people who aren't tired/burnt out/anxious. It's so amazing to come out of that law school bubble and see that the real world is still there.